I have been wanting to write this post for a while. I have been in a long-distance relationship for 1 year and 9 months so far and we have been finding more and more ways to make it easier to cope with.
Long distance relationships are generally considered difficult and likely to end in disaster. A lot of the time this is true but isn’t that the case for any relationship, long distance or not? All relationships take work, long distance relationships can sometimes take a little bit more.
Dom and I have spent most our relationship long distance, all except for the first month. The following suggestions are how we have kept going and kept our hopes up.
- Know when the long-distance will end
This isn’t always possible but it really helps to know when you will finally get to be closer and see each other more. This helps provide a bit of relief knowing that it isn’t going to be that way forever.
For us this will be when my work placement ends and I go back to university for my final year as Dom will also be in his final year then too. We are both studying Engineering Masters so we will be having lectures together, for this reason Dom will continue to live with his friends and I have a studio flat so that we would still have our own space for when we need it. Rushing into being around each other 24/7 could make things very difficult especially with it being such a high-pressure year of university (dissertation time, eek!)
- Plan things in advance together
Keeping to the idea of having things to look forward to, this really does help. It keeps you both positive knowing you have exciting things to enjoy together. This could be anything from just a weekend visiting each other to a holiday.
Some of the best things Dom and I have had to look forward to were our holiday in Tenerife last June and seeing the Harry Potter play just before we went as well as a couple of concerts in November and the start of March. Currently we have tickets to The Killers at Hyde Park in June and a Holiday with my family in September (marking the end of the long-distance part of our relationship). We also have a couple of small things planned like celebrating the end of Dom’s exams and my Birthday.
- Skype and Face Time
One of the things that has really helped us is being able to stay in contact as much as possible, especially with video calls as it is a great way for you to feel closer even when you are miles away. Part of this is talking about how your day has been also helps make you feel more part of each other’s day to day lives.
This has got harder for us this year as neither of us has a strong internet connection, but we still do our best to at least have phone calls. We also, like most people, text each other constantly. There are of course times when one or both of us is busy and can’t reply straight away, but it is important to be understanding of that and not get hung up on it.
- Take every opportunity you can to see each other and make the most of it
Again, this is easier if you only have a couple of hours of distance like we do and not an entire ocean. Either way it is important. Making the effort to see each other whenever you can and really making the most of those times is essential.
Last year Dom travelled to visit me about twice a month on the weekends. This year I am the one on placement, I travel to him two or three times a month, although that will be more difficult through April and May when we will have about 5 weeks between seeing each other.
At the end of the day, every relationship is different and you need to work out what is best for the two of you, these are just things which have helped us. At the end of the day, you just need to work together and trust that you can make it last.
I would love to know if you have any more tips for us to help with the next 5 months until Dom and I are in the same place again. I hope I have helped some of you!
Thanks for Reading!
The Mechanic x